I can't win for losing. . .

Last year I forgot both kids' school valentine's parties, because they fell on Friday the 13th right between Taz's annual bout of pneumonia and his fifth surgery and because I had to attend a CLE seminar that day to finish my credits for the prior year before the $100-penalty deadline.

So this year, I planned ahead.

I have become a Google calendar fiend. I use it to track our vast number of special needs appointments, work and class schedules, soccer and gymnastics practice, bill payment deadlines. . . you name it.

If you can name it, I track it!

I remembered to buy both kids' party stuff, candy and cards at BigLots, Michaels, Sams Club and Krogers, while I had 20-50 percent-off coupons in hand and money in the bank. No mean feat in this economy when every penny counts.

I scheduled time on Wednesday night to organize, label and package each kid's party items at the kitchen table, while dinner was cooking in my crock-pot and dh and I were discussing this week's appointments.

I sent Jessie off to Omega Academy yesterday morning laden down with Valentine's candy, party decorations and a yummy cookie cake, which she personally picked out at the store, and I scheduled time to make Taz's GFCF brownie hearts last night, while cooking Chinese in my new Sams Club rice cooker/steamer.

Yes, that's right, you did not misread.

I have become SUPERMOM.

I can bring home the bacon, fry it up in a pan and clean up the dishes, all while maintaining my sanity as the best mother to two special needs children on the planet.

. . .

NOT!!!!!!!!

This is where Nianya's Law kicks in and my super mom story falls apart.

Nianya's Law for parenting special needs children states that "If anything can go wrong, it will, at the worst possible moment."

So what does that have to do with Valentine's Day this year? It's not like today is Friday the 13th again. . .

Yesterday, Taz had his first appointment at a new pediatric dentist, who specializes in working with special needs children. I scheduled Taz's appointment in the early afternoon, during his most medically cooperative time of day.

Unfortunately, that meant that we also had to check Jessie out of school 30 minutes early, because the dental office is located a good 40 minutes from our home and we would be gone for several hours.

When I consulted my calendar the night before, I briefly panicked at the thought of having to check Jessie out early on her Valentine's party day.

Then, I remembered that it was the last day of school before a week-long winter break and, since the kids have lunch at noon and get out at 1:30 each day, I figured that the party would start at lunch and be going on for a good 30 minutes before Jessie had to leave.

More than enough time for the Jessinator to eat her fill in candy, cookies and cake.

Again. . .

NOT!

Apparently Jessie's teachers are a lot smarter than I am, because the kids had an early lunch and went back to work before the party. We arrived at the very last minute to pick her up. . .

exactly 5 minutes before the party started!

As we bustled Jessie into the car with an already stimming Tazmanian Devil, one of the teachers thanked me for the cookies, candies and favors that we brought for the party and assured us that they would pack up Jessie's goodie bag and send it with a friend to soccer practice last night.

We were already on the road, before it dawned on me that, not only had Jessie missed her party, but we didn't even have a bag of goodies to munch on for the 40 minute drive.

So what about Taz you ask?

It's not as if his party is ruined, since his party is scheduled for today and I already have everything ready. I even remembered to tell his teacher yesterday, when we checked him out, that I would put all of Taz's goodies in his backpack, so he wouldn't forget them. . .

. . . and I was fully prepared to spend all last night cooking yummy GFCF brownie hearts, one mini-heart-shaped-pan at a time. . .I only have one pan, so I have to keep refilling it and putting it in back in the oven for 15 minutes at a time.

Nianya's Law. . .AGAIN!

Last night, as I was cleaning the kitchen and preparing to bake the brownies, I started noticing my Facebook friends' comments about grocery store panic and getting stuck in the house for yet another weekend.

I'm like, come on, this is HotLanta, not the Midwest, Northeast or Washington D.C.

It never snows here.

Um, well, except for that 5-day extra long weekend last month when we got 2 inches and could not get out of our driveway, much less up the steep hill of our street.

But, come on, people, it's the middle of February and General Beauregard Lee swore we'd have an early spring.

Again, NOT!

In a last minute ditch effort to save Valentines, I opted not to make the brownies last night.

Given Nianya's Law, I figured, if I made the brownies, they would close the schools and, if I didn't, they would not. Taz would have to party without his brownies, but at least he would get to party.

So dh and I watched the news and the web last night and waited and waited and waited some more, while the list of school closings grew county-by-county. After the 10 o'clock news, Dh happily declared that there would be school today.

Um, NOT!

Sure enough, at exactly 11:10 pm, while listening to Hope for Haiti Now on the iPod and snuggled in bed with hot tea and a good book, my Blackberry started the telltale text message buzz and tune. I didn't even have to pick it up to know that it was the school system notifying all of us super moms, who signed up for instant text alerts, that the schools were closed for Friday.

I think it's time I added a caveat to Nianya's Law: "There's not a damn thing you can do about it, so just suck it up and move on."

Nianya

P.S. I still claim title to the Greatest Special Needs Mom on the planet, since I'm up blogging before the crack of dawn, while facing another weekend stuck in the house with the 7yo #ASD/ADHD Tazmanian Devil and, while he may have a snow day, I DO NOT.

I telecommute, so I have to work come rain, snow, sleet or Biblical flood (which I might add that we suffered through last fall).

P.P.S. Not only did we get 4 inches of snow that day, which I might add was the Friday before another 5-day school holiday weekend, but when Taz finally went back to school the next Thursday I forgot to include his Valentines. I mean come on, who celebrates Valentines a whole week after the fact. Apparently the 2nd grade! UNCLE

Just a few dental caries. . .

That's what I get from the hoity toity doctor we saw today for Taz's pre-op.

Not my choice to see that doctor and we'll probably never see her again, but you'd think she would read the medical history I meticulously filled out two weeks ago when we came in for our first pre-op before she asks me if Taz has a history of any medical problems other than dental caries.

Of gee, I don't know. How about pneumonia!!!

Perhaps they forgot to write that down on his chart two weeks ago when we postponed his surgery, because he couldn't breathe.

Okay, I exaggerate just a bit, he could breathe, just not without hacking up his lungs.

Seriously, I should be able to sluff this stuff off by now, but I'm just a bit on the edge today. More than a bit, actually, and I'm incensed that a doctor had the nerve to reduce Taz's issues to a FEW DENTAL CARIES!

If you follow my blog, you know that Taz has run the gammit from prematurity to previous major oral surgery and everything in between. To make a long story short, he's an adorable almost 7-year-old midgit, who is about to lose several teeth and get the rest of them capped with stainless steel to preserve them until his adult teeth come in.

He's very proud of the silver molars from his previous oral surgery. . .all that he remembers of that trip to the OR.

And, memory is the biggest problem we face tomorrow.

This will be his 5th time in the OR in 6 short years. He has very little memory of the previous surgeries. He was only 4.5 years old the last time.

Now he has a memory like a steel trap and he's asking questions I don't want to answer.

• Will the hospital have shots mommy?
• No Taz (IVs aren't shot).
• Would you like to give the tooth fairy some teeth this weekend Taz?
• No mommy, none of them are loose enough. She'll have to wait awhile!

I'm so tired of having to be the strong one, but I have no choice. I'm a special needs mother!

And, when I start to panic tomorrow, I will remind myself that there will be two pairs of strong arms holding me tomorrow on the way to the OR.

Taz on his loopy juice, hugging me goodbye, and God, lifting me up and carrying through it.

Nianya

Valentines is just another day in Holland for a special needs mom. . .

Sometimes I think the "real" world could do with a few less holidays.

When you're a special needs parent, its hard enough to remember and schedule your children's daily routines and medications, keep their doctor's appointments and get there on time, worry about day care while your other children are in surgery etc. . .

Not to mention trying to work full time and get all you Continuing Education Credits.

How the heck are we supposed to remember things like Valentines cards for our kid's classmates?

I'm not even sure they celebrate Valentine's Day in Holland!

My son has been in public school for one month, he's missed at least a week of that time for doctor's appointments and sick days and he has surgery scheduled during next week's winter break.

He went to school early this morning before his ADHD meds. kicked in, because Mom and Dad have to attend an all-day CLE seminar today to get credit before the March deadline.

And, while I sit here trying to catch up on the news and all my e-mail, I suddenly remember that today is Valentine's Day at school.

It's also Friday the 13th.

So with my luck, instead of remembering the pneumonia he had last week or next week's surgery, my son will remember this day for the rest of his life!

He will never let me forget the day I sent him to school w/o his Valentines!

Nianya

Some people just need to Get a Clue. . .

As the mother of two special needs children the past several days have been typically over stressful. It started last week on the way to my son's pre-op.

• My daughter's ortho called to remind me that we missed her appt. and to tell me that I owe a $35 missed appt. fee. I say, I think not, my son is having surgery on Friday, give me a break.
• At pre-op, we learn that my son has pneumonia and his surgery has to be postponed.
• We go to urgent care for a chest x-ray and they tell us he has to stay home for 5 days.
• I fax the doctor's excuse to the school and get a call the next night telling me that my son missed school that day. YAH THINK!
• My son finally goes back to school today and comes home with a note from the P.E. teacher saying he's in trouble for not wearing tennis shoes at P.E. again (HELLO he has pneumonia.)
• And, to top it all off, my son is now reacting to his antibiotic.

I was going to throw the P.E. teacher's note in the trash and pretend I never saw it, but, in my current mood, I'm seriously thinking about responding:

GET A CLUE!!! My asthmatic, ASD/ADHD son has PNEUMONIA! The last thing he needs is P.E. right now.

If the teacher is lucky, I will calm down by tomorrow. If not, C'est la vie!

Nianya

Not just a walk in the park. . .

My life that is.

If you followed my twitter today, you know that we went for Taz's pre-op found out he had pneumonia and had to reschedule his surgery. Our visit to urgent care was almost comical. The doctor couldn't believe I was taking it all so well.

BTDT: When the Pre-op nurse practitioner said he had active wheezing and crackling in his lungs, I already knew what the X-ray would show. This is the umpteenth time he's had pneumonia. I suppose you'd call it walking pneumonia, but with Taz, it's more like whirl, stop and cough, whirl, stop and cough, and whirl some more.

We don't call him the Tasmanian Devil for nothing.

It does start to wear on me a bit. When I finally got home at 3 pm after leaving the house at 9:30 for the pre-op, I collapsed, and slept for 2.5 hours until my Blackberry alarm went off to warn me that I had to get back to Sam's Club pharmacy to pick up all his scripts before they closed.

On the way there, I get a call from Taz's school:

Hellooo (insert recorded British Accent), I'm calling to inform you that you son or daughter was absent from school today. . .

I hang up, LMAO and LMAO some more.

Didn't they get my faxed memo saying that he had PNEUMONIA???

BTW: If you're following this blog, I hope you check out the Daily Inspirational Quotes. Today's was very fitting.

"Humor is the great thing, the saving thing. The minute it crops up, all our irritation and resentments slip away, and a sunny spirit takes their place."

Mark Twain

Nianya

P.S. I swear he's almost 7 even though the costume his sister wore at age 3 is still too big.